Quitters Are Losers
by Epitaph-Please-Write-Me
Summary: YAOI 'And the legendary hero looked for his friend awhile,and then gave up and went home.' Wrong. Sora wants everyone on Destiny Isles to forget his sorry face, so he runs away to a far off town. Riku's been in KH for 3 years now..wrong again.


^-^ Greetings everyone! Thank you so much for clicking the link to this fic! Anyway, I needed a break from TDBCAI, so I'm writing this...I wanted something with more of a forlorn feeling and a light hearted tinge.  
So this is it! Of course, its YAOI, so pleeeeease, don't read if your against it. Flames are frowned upon by anti-sora-  
  
Anti-Sora:........* blank expression *  
  
- and shall be seen as displays of humanities mass ignorance.  
Anyway, I don't own Kingdom Hearts or any of its characters, so don't sue me. Even if you did, all you'd get would be my um.....um......soul. and its not that good, anyway.  
  
WARNINGS: YAOI and slight AU (the greatest combo ever ^-^)  
  
---  
  
It had happened several times now.  
  
-' Sora stared, mouth hanging open. All of his senses and emmotions were in a jumble, and they seemed to scatter as though his brain couldn't put the peices together and eventually threw them across the room in frustration.  
A cloud clang was heard through the alley as he dropped his keyblade, the magical door sealer hitting the wet stone of the ground once before disapparating in a flurry of golden sparks.  
  
He couldn't beleive it.  
  
" R....r....ik....k..rik..."   
  
The name refused to escape his lips, it seemed so long since he had said it aloud, so long....  
His heart seemed to sink to the pit of his stomach, recalling all the emmotions he had felt for so long, the hurt, the longing, the sorrow....so long...  
  
3 years.  
  
Tears pricked at his eyes, and his breath was caught in his throat, he couldn't move, he couldnt breath, and he almost couldn't speak, perhaps in some subconcious fear of the figure dissapearing or fading like it had so many times in his dreams. The rain poured lighter upon the stoned pavement, but still hard; yet it was as if it was going in slow motion, because he couldn't feel it on his cheeks, yet he could, detached from his mortal body. The form was still there, just standing, in the rain, staring back at him with the face that he adored and was haunted by all at once.  
  
Smiling.  
  
All the emmotions were swept away like a curtain at dawn, and the sunlight filled Sora.  
  
" Riku!"  
  
Running across the street, miracolously not slipping in the puddles, it seemed forever before he reached the one....it had been so long, yet so little time in normal standards. The clock had slowed to a torchering pace as soon as Sora had seen the face, a fake smile plastered upon its lips as the door closed, speaking words that didn't reach his ringing ears....as the door....closed. Sealing him forever. Or so thought.  
  
He wrapped his sore life-exhausted arms around the black coated Riku, who had grown tall, and was almost a head and a half taller than him.   
  
" Riku Riku Riku Riku Riku Riku...." he said, as though chanting. Eventually his voice broke and he began to sob, the name no longer sounding like a painful memory anymore. Gently, almost as if afraid to break him, the arms crossed across his back in an embrace, the total opposite of his breath cutting grip that seemed him afraid to let go.  
  
He looked up, the tears flowing from his once souless blue eyes, and he saw it, it was real..real....  
  
" ..Riku.....where....when...what....Riku.." He couldn't speak anymore, the effort seemed to great. It was real..and his mind was in an oblivion of broken sadness. Then, his best friend, whose voice seemed to be far from the verge of crying; ( perfect display of his manly pride) smiled lightly down at him.  
  
" Sora."  
  
Sora......that was his name.'-  
  
And he always woke up from the dream.  
  
Sitting in the thin sheets of the bed, which were tangled around his legs, tears rolling down his face, catching the tears in his hands, " why....why......," whispering in a hoarse voice,"...why do you haunt me....." Sora's shoulders racked with supressed sobs.  
  
The dreams were becoming more frequent. They weren't just haunting him at night,anymore. They prevented him from getting proper sleep....he wandered nowadays, the heartless were gone, and he seemed to have no more purpose, he just wandered....next to himself, around the town and house, occaisonally sleeping on park benches or even tables at restraunts. Then he would wake late, crying. Riku....just wouldn't leave him alone.  
  
" No.....No!" he cried, the frustrartion and dejectedness of it all pouring out of him as he pounded the spring mastress with his fists. " if you can make me dream...like this...of...why do you HAVE TO HAUNT ME SO MUCH!" he almost screamed this, so wound up in emmotional trauma he didn't even think about what the neighbors were going to think. " if you....you must.....haunt..." he was choking, he could'nt breath through his sobs and hiccups...he collapsed against the pillow, " ...why...",bloodshot sapphire eyes staring off into the darkness as his years of sleeplessness began to show once more.  
  
"....why do you make me wake up?.."  
  
He hadn't spoken Riku's name aloud, except for in his dreams, since Kingdom Hearts was sealed.  
  
---  
  
Put on your coat.  
  
Feel light headed.  
  
Button up.   
  
Wrap scarf securley around your ne-  
no, don't cut off your air supply...  
  
Put on boots.  
  
Put on earmuffs.  
  
Quit fucking moping and go outside.  
  
Sora exited the house, fiddling with the small silver key inbetween his heavily gloved fingers for a moment before jamming it into the hole on the door. He took a shaky breath and dropped the door opener and closer into his pocket securley...  
  
* keyblade *  
* keyblade *  
  
Just a memory that subconciously surfaced.  
  
The air going in and out of his body was visible in the cold air....the sky was cloudless and gray, and although it seemed like night or early early morning, it was the afternoon. He wasn't wearing winter gear because it was cold outside, no, it was in the middle of September. It seemed he was always cold in chilly weather. Probally something to do with his body tempature, it probally wasn't doing its job, like some people...  
This wasn't a strange city, mahagony brick houses with black iron gates, looking rather old with the cramped together houses...almost like a town, but overpopulated.. The trees that lined the road in a paralell fashion were now a faded brown, branches inbetween being naked and being covered with leaves. Only splotches of dark green covered them, along with nothing more than thin white snow lined with silver.  
Although it might have fit the novel-like scenery for the streets to be empty, small children ran through, throwing snow balls and plump heavily clothed women bustled to maintain them. It was still hussle and bussle...everyone seemed happy, or at least content with living.  
And so Sora walked down the opposite side of the street, with fewer people, keeping his eyes to the ground. The scarf he had put on was wrapped around his face in a turtle neck like manner..he had gotten sick of the akwardness of people recognizing who he was.  
  
Sora had a bit of a heartache when he first moved here, because it had the familiar twinge of Tranverse town.  
He had spent the first few days thinking back...wondering if he had made the wrong decision. But then....he decided that his decision was his own, and his own was his right. ...Then the dreams had started, after he had lived here a year. It all seemed to random. Yet...meaningful. But a meaning he couldn't place; couldn't compute with his mind...kind of like those word jumble things. Not the scrambles, the ones that involve pictures or boxes... like, a box with the word 'think' outside of it. That one was easy, one of the few he could ever figure out. " thinking outside of the box." Sora said to himself, his eyes drooping abit. Perhaps he should of worn less clothing, the warmth of his coat and scarf and mittens and boots and....etc....was beginning to make him drowsy.   
That was the kind of town this was, it usually rained or snowed, there never seemed to be any tropical, grassy, sun-filled lets-go-to-the-beach days(1). And Sora liked it that way, even though it didn't help his seemingly narcoclepcy(2)-like behavior.  
  
He had spent half a year lookng for Riku, and Kairi, broken hearted and hopeless...and then, Donald and Goofy left...abandonned...gave up on him...got sick....got sick of him, and ran of to attend to the affairs at their kingless castle. He spent the rest of the year, alone and becoming more and more depressed, before he gave up....and moved here. He wanted away, he wanted them to forget, but most of all, *he* wanted to forget. It was very sick and pitiful in his head everytime....And the legendary KeyBlade Weilder eventually gave up and went home. Home.....Selphie, Wakka, Tidus,..Kairi...probally thought he was dead. He hoped they did. Kairi was probally heartbroken after the year. But she was probally over it. Her heart ache was different than his, and for that, he envied her, but was happy...in a way...  
  
His eyes seemed ready to close, and there was a deep rumbling in his ears, and it seemed he could already hear himself stuttering over the name.  
  
Suddenly, something made a dull thump against his foot, and there was a shout. He blinked at looked down, at a small sled. Funny. He hadn't felt it barley at all, even though it seemed it had hit his leg head-on.  
Looking around, he saw some children on the other side of the street, waving at him.  
  
" Come on, Key boy! "  
  
" Give it here!"  
  
" Pwease?"  
  
Wince. Key boy, it had a bitter humor to it that stung. Of course when he came here everyone recognized him for who he was, and he could only assume the children had picked it up during a 'adult conversation'. Who did he think he was going to hide his identidy from? Everyone knew his mass of chocolate brown spikes. But he *hated* hats. Smiling at them, even though they couldn't see through his scarf ( unless they were really aliens with x-ray vision, as he later dwelled on breifly), and kicked the sled lightly back with one of his giant shoe clad feet.  
  
His response was a dozen shouts of approval as it was returned, skidding to a stop infront of them. Apparently, his aim wasn't too far off.  
Continuing on his way, the voices faded, and his mind was free to wander again. He wandered...Kairi. She had been the main thing, the queen ant, the idolized, attentionized, princess of the two boys back on the island. She had been a source of rivalry for the two boys, who really werent lacking any competition for eachother, but still, a girl was a girl and a friend was a friend...and a crush was a crush. Then...it had happened. The tapestry of darkness had hung low on Destiny isles, and Riku....Kairi...had...he...  
  
He cut his depressing thoughts short. It was almost as if he had gave up like a quitter and came here all over again. Those were those kind of thoughts. Besides, he had arrived at his destination.  
  
Walking inside, he whipped off his scarf and hung it on the rack, not really paying attention to the huff of not so cold wind, no, only in his mind, that followed him inside as the bells on the door jangled it shut. It was all routine.   
  
" Boy!" emitted a gruff voice from the depths of a large burly mustache," You here?!"  
  
The question seemed arrelevant enough, because the asker was standing right there. A large man with few hairs on his head and many on his upper lip- that is, if he had one. You couldn't even see his mouth.   
  
" Yes sir." Sora said monotonously.  
This man had been Sora's boss for the time he had lived here. He worked on machanics- something close to a gummi ship, but not quite. He had always assumed this city hadn't been introduced to that technology yet; because the man didn't seem to know all that much. Of course, Sora didn't know everything either, but he deffinatley knew more from his 'Gummi Ship Captain/Modifer' duties back in the day. Whatever meaning that knowledge had was meaningless though, because Sora was basically the order form/delivery boy. He always placed the orders of the customers, calculating the expense and time, and was always delivering things like spare parts....  
  
" Good! I need you to go pick up some parts from the store!" continued the boss-man distractedly. " Go get the munny from the register....about 479, that should do- AH! here we go!" He stopped instructing Sora and focused his attention back on....whatever he was doing.  
  
Like he was told ( aww...what a good boy), Sora stalked up to the register and withdrawed the right amount of munny, taking a little extra, because boss-man-guy there had a little problem with estimation. He mentally shuddered at the memory of how embarrassed he had been when he didn't have enough money for a part.   
Not even bothering to get his scarf, he strolled out the door, letting it close noisily behind him.   
  
He didn't even have to be told which store the part was at, he had been doing this for quite a while now and was used to it now. It was a routine-get-used-to-it kind of place, after all.  
  
---  
  
Strangest ever, you might think, but not to the people living there. Rain had now decided to pour, washing away the thin snow that lined the streets. Deep blue eyes watches with a nonchalant look as he exited the store, grasping some munny in his hand. Work was over. He had almost forgotten it was pay day. The part had been bought, and had helped fuzzy wuzzy mustache with his latest vehicle related challange. After that, all Sora had had to do was stand around organizing order forms and ocaisionally having to place a fake smile on his face to greet customers. Now all he had to do was go home and waste the rest of his life away.  
  
He smiled lightly, he had become such a pessimistic lethargian latley.  
  
Lazy Bum.  
  
Shaking his head, he stopped in his tracks. Chances were, if he went home he would fall asleep, and if he fell asleep, he'd have to go through that awful dream again. He really didn't want to mess with that right now. There had to be something to do....ahh.....the park was good. Changing direction, he couldn't help thinking about that damned dream. Why...it was kinda like a movie or something, with the forlornity spicing it all....but it was differently. Most people went into the depths of despair over their loves, constantly dwelling on the fact that, ' oh, i never told you how much i loved you,' or ' i wish i knew how you felt!'.  
  
But Sora.....Riku knew.  
  
- flashback -  
  
Riku looked mildy suprised. It wasn't even his mask that had hid it, it just hadn't suprised him.   
  
Agony soaked through Sora's veins as he waited for some sort of response....some sort...it seemed to take hours, when it was really only minutes.  
  
Sigh. The aquamarine eyes closed, and then opened again, staring off at the ocean as if Sora had never said anything. Sitting on the curved Paopu tree....like always, while the rest of them played, Riku sat alone staring off into the distance, unreadable thoughts obviously running through his silver haired head.  
  
' I'm so so so sorry Sora, ' geniune concern fueled along with something that was confusing, guilt,' but I don't..feel that way back.'   
  
And a crunching sound ringing through his ears, as though his heart had *really* been broken, instead of that being just a figure of speech.   
  
He covered his tears and emmotions with a sheepish grin and sigh.  
  
' nah, I'm the one to be sorry Riku...'  
Then the suprise, and the eyes of deepest green turned on him, a spark of confusing in the orbs.  
  
' you really don't need that on your shoulders, too..'  
  
Riku smirked a bit, and it seemed all so much better to see the expression. ' too?'  
  
He looked over at him, akwardness hardly forgotten. ' yeah, you seem to be thinking about something latley .'  
  
Quirking eyebrow. ' so you noticed. ah hah, staring at me in secret Sora, marveled by my beauty? '  
  
A fluttering of his eyelashes and a strong arm around his shoulders, accompanied by the two boys laughs.  
' so your...not...mad?' Sora asked timidly. It all seemed so natural! Why wasn't Riku freaking, yelling...why was'nt he crying in his room at rejection yet? It seemed all so forgotten.  
  
Chuckling skeptism ' mad? of course not, why would I be mad? Thats stupid. You know me better than that. '  
  
They sat there, on the tree, his arm around Sora's shoulders, and Sora smiling dejectedly, but contently. Somehow at once; there was not a setting sun or anything, he had come out and said it in the middle of the afternoon. Just the blue sky and an even bluer sea. They watched it for what seemed to be years and years that Sora hoped would last forever.  
  
' Actually, I have been thinking about something. '  
  
' huh? '  
  
And Riku had shared all his feelings and ideas about other worlds and stuff to him then, getting him more and more excited about the idea of leaving to adventure. It was about two years later that he told Kairi; when Sora had practically forgot, making it seem like a new thing. Then Kairi thought up the raft. So they began to build it.  
  
Riku had been his best friend the whole time, knowing about it, yet being good natured. He never fussed about Sora's alittle more than ' your my friend' hugs, infact, he always joked about them, always so good about it...  
  
' hey now Sora, didn't I already tell ya your not cute enough for me? '  
  
' alittle closer and we'd get arrested! '  
  
' now now now, i'm not your teddy bear. come off it, I know you have a teddy bear.'  
  
So good. Best Friend. Riku, who hadn't minded when Sora had asked something that he had taken years to work up the gall to say, literally, on his birthday; When he had turned 13, only a few months after the confession.  
  
' Riku..can..um....I.....kiss you...? just once! pretty please? '  
  
Blushing as red as Kairi's hair probally.  
  
A blink, and a ruffle of the hair, followed by a playful stuck out tounge.  
  
' Ok, but only once, don't get used to it, it's only cuz' its your birthday.'  
  
-end of flashback-  
  
He walked underneath a tree, shaking his mass of brown spiokes like a god to free them of the wet drops of rain. The park always had lots of trees. Good for this, bad for lightning. 'What a horrible way to die', Sora had dwelled on often in the past,' oh yeah, him there- a *tree* fell on him.'  
  
He walked over to the deep blue jungle gym, chuckling, placing his large shoes onto the frame work and easing himself up to the top. The jungle gym was conviently under a tree, where only a few stray raindrops fell upon the painted metal. He stared off into the distance of the gray clouds, where they seemed to stretch to the ground as the town ended, like a mist...or a barrier. Pulling his knees up to his chest, he suddenly felt wide awake. No sleepiness, wide awake.....the rain loud and strong in his ears and nose. He wondered...what Riku was doing in Kingdom Hearts now. Hah...take that Riku, you anti-forsaken jerk! Sora didn't feel sleepy at all now! You were behind in the game!  
  
He had won the race, the swordfights, the bet about what colour Tidus' underwear was, how late he could stay up....and Sora had won in the battle of the keyblade, of hearts, of Ansem, of Ponochio..And Sora hadn't fallen alseep all week...  
  
Yep, Riku was losing, because Sora was going to make up those other 57 points fast!  
  
Suddenly, every thing seemed so real on Sora. He wondered what was beyond the gray clouds....now he would wait for the rain to stop.  
  
He didn't know that somewhere far off, or close, or both...Riku was searching for him.  
  
--  
  
1- is this reminding you of something?  
2- can't...spell....  
  
Well! What did you think? Please reveiw, I don't want this to be one-shot!   
  
~ Epitaph 


End file.
